Many times, it’s not that your child lacks ability, but in the latter stages of the race, what matters most is the parents’ effort.

Every family aims at peers, and parents all show their own skills. S-level families seek S-level positions for their kids; A-level families go for A-level spots. But what if they can’t get one? An S-level parent might snatch an A-level spot for their kid on the fly, and an A-level parent might grab a B-level spot instead. So ask yourself: if you’re a B, how easy is it to fight for an A-level spot? Very hard. Extremely, extremely hard—because your real opponent isn’t the other kid; it’s their parents.

In the first half of the game, you prove you’ve worked hard by outperforming your parents. But in the second half, simply matching them is already considered great effort. At the end of the day, you shouldn’t blame yourself for missing opportunities—that was more about their generation than yours.