They want both substance and face, both practical value and emotional value. Most people don't actually want to solve problems — they want the approval of others, and to be immersed in a value system validated by others.
And when you're willing to provide this cost-free emotional currency, you effectively control what gives other people meaning.
In the episode where Sun Wukong beats the White Bone Demon three times, why was he driven away? Because you ate that tough meal far too harshly. Did the demon reveal its true form? Did it commit any evil deeds?
No true form appeared, no evil was done—were you really fighting a demon? You were clearly slapping your leader’s face.
Your approach was too domineering; you made your leader uncomfortable.
If you only realize a problem exists when it's already right in front of you—or if you had zero preparation going in—don't even think about it. Chaos will never be a ladder for you.
It's not about logic; it's about love, incentives, and the art of coaxing—the real trump card for dealing with kids.
If you have a solution, would you need to prevent it? If you can resolve the issue the moment it strikes, would there still be a need to guard against it?