Romance Partnership Agreement
▎General Principles
Our relationship should be:
· Pure, not tied to money, status, or other external things
· Democratic, with both partners actively maintaining equality and discussing matters rationally
· Loyal, showing honesty and devotion to each other, without deception
· Romantic but rooted in friendship first—sharing burdens and growing together
▎Communication
· Regular family meetings: Hold a formal check-in every _______ (week/month) to address recurring conflicts or issues, document them in writing, and gently remind each other throughout daily life
· Increase communication frequency: Chat often, even about nothing in particular. Share your work and life experiences and reflections with each other regularly
· Speed-first principle: If something makes you uncomfortable while spending time together, bring it up with your partner as soon as possible
· Avoid assuming bad intent: Both partners have the right to voice their own opinions. When unpleasant situations arise, don’t obsess over who’s right or wrong—instead, ask, “What were you thinking?”
· Prioritize mutual benefit: When decisions hit a stalemate, resolve them by maximizing what’s best for both of you. If one person needs to compromise, the other should offer ample understanding and comfort, and proactively yield in future disagreements
· How to handle conflicts or arguments:
1) The more emotionally stable partner should help the other get through the intense moment—maybe with a hug
2) Analyze the surface triggers and deeper causes of the conflict together; the person in the wrong should offer a sincere apology
3) Summarize the situation and agree in writing on how to prevent similar conflicts from arising in the future
4) Never avoid the issue—no shutting down, deleting each other from contacts, giving the silent treatment, or walking out
▎Finances
· Open a joint account: We agree to set up a shared living fund (such as a joint bank account managed by the more financially savvy partner). Every _______ (week/month), we’ll review income and expenses and identify ways to improve
· Agree on contribution ratios: Each month, we’ll each deposit _______% of our income into the joint account, because ___________________________. When we receive our salaries and other earnings, we’ll transfer our respective shares to the joint account first; the remainder is ours to spend freely
· Joint account covers shared expenses: Daily needs like food, clothing, housing, and transportation; major purchases like a house or car; mortgage payments; children’s education; investments; and other jointly agreed-upon costs such as travel or gifts for both sets of parents. It cannot be used for spontaneous gifts to each other, which should come from personal funds
· Investing the joint account: Maintain a generally prudent investment style, aligned with our shared vision for how and when the fund will be used in the future
· Splitting the fund if we part ways: In principle, refunds will follow each person’s contribution ratio. If there are questions about how past large expenses were divided, we can work it out through discussion (after all, anyone willing to sign this agreement is reasonable)
▎Growth
“Why do you want to be with me?”
“Because I like the person I become when I’m with you. We lift each other up and become better versions of ourselves.”
· Set goals: Each partner drafts their own short-term growth plan or work plan, and we share them every _______ (week/month)
· Hold each other accountable: Keep an eye on each other’s goals and action plans, and offer gentle progress reminders when appropriate
· Grow together: Every _______ (week/month), pick a time to ________ (read a book, travel, watch a movie, etc.) and explore the joys of life side by side
· Empower each other: Every _______ (week/month), set aside time to introduce your partner to your friends, share skills you’ve learned, and so on