Blind dates (and partnerships) are essentially about trading cards

Matchmaking that charges you money in exchange for a guaranteed number of people you can meet is, in essence, the same as poker’s option to replace cards a certain number of times.

So you need to clarify whether you should swap, and what counts as a good hand for you.

Whether to swap, and what constitutes a good hand, both depend on the starting hand you’re dealt.

Marriage is also a kind of partnership on one side, and partnership means sharing control — meaning your partner is very likely to participate in decision-making. If your starting hand is already strong, swapping may actually weaken your position. In that case, what you need is a partner who doesn’t share decision-making power. In other words, you don’t want to swap into a bigger hand; you want to maintain your current advantage and avoid swapping.

The only time you need to swap is when your hand is already poor. Only then do you need a partner whose family background or capabilities can help you reorganize and improve your hand.

So a bigger hand isn’t what matters; what matters is winning the game.

Any transaction works only when the other party feels they’re getting a bargain — both sides feel they’ve come out ahead (or both see each other as getting a steal). A partnership isn’t charity; it’s about building each other’s hands after a swap. Complementary strengths are what attract investment.

So first, carefully assess your own hand: figure out what makes winning easiest for you, and what cards you need to improve your hand. Then go find someone who can supply those cards.